Truth, tenderness, humour, and clarity.
Sacha Hoogerwerf - Get Real Connection
I am Sacha Hoogerwerf
The person behind Get Real Connection.
My passion is real, honest human connection.
Whether I’m alongside someone dying, guiding a ceremony, or facilitating a workshop, I believe deeply in the courage of showing up fully — for ourselves and each other. You already have what you need. Sometimes you just need someone willing to guide you there.
I’d be honoured to walk alongside you.
What is a Rite of Passage?
A Rite of Passage is the conscious marking of a transition — the moment you move from one chapter of life into the next. Rather than letting these threshold moments slip by unnoticed, we pause, we witness, and we honour the change that is taking place.
Every Rite of Passage moves through three phases: first a separation, a letting go of what was; then the transition itself, the in-between space where transformation happens; and finally a re-integration, stepping forward into who you are becoming.
The threads that weave it all together are ritual and symbolism — a looking back at what has been, a stillness in the present moment, and a clear-eyed gaze toward what lies ahead. Most of all, it is the act of consciously crossing the threshold, and taking the time to integrate and harvest the meaning of what you have lived.
This is the work. And it is available to all of us, at every stage of life.

Life.
Life is a spiral — from birth through childhood, adolescence, adulthood, elderhood, and finally death. Along the way are big moments of change, sometimes obvious, sometimes not.
It’s in those moments that I offer my service. Pausing to witness — and be witnessed — creates a deepening of shared experience and clears the way for what comes next. Call it ritual, call it marking life stages, call it attention for the real stuff. This is where the gold can be found. For ourselves, our families, and our communities.
I’ve created bespoke ceremonies for baby blessings, new parent blessings, love unions, birthdays, menopause, career change, divorce, recovery, and new beginnings after crisis. Big or small, it all starts with a chat.
Bea Pokor, Nelson, Aotearoa · Bespoke birthday celebration
Erin Leigh, Wellington, Aotearoa · Marriage officiation & celebration

Joyce Deane, Nelson · Deathwalker & family support
David Zeegers, Amsterdam · Deathwalker, family support, funeral celebrant
What is a deathwalker?
A deathwalker is a guide. Someone who walks alongside the dying and their loved ones — not to take over, not to have all the answers, but to help you find your own way through one of life’s most profound passages.
Death is not a medical event to be managed. It is a deeply human experience, and you are more capable of meeting it than you might think. My role is to walk beside you, to ask the questions that open new ground, and to help you discover what this threshold looks like for you — on your own terms, in your own way.
I believe that families and dying people hold more wisdom than they realise. Sometimes that wisdom just needs a little space, a steady presence, and someone willing to go there with you. I am not here to carry it for you. I am here to remind you that you can carry it yourself — and to walk alongside you while you do.
I have trained as a deathwalker, facilitated Death Cafes, and sat with dying people in their most vulnerable and most courageous moments. I am not a therapist. I am a mortal human who has loved and lost, and to me grief means love.
Want to understand the role more deeply? This talk by deathwalker Zenith Virago is a beautiful place to start.
Link: Watch the TED talk
I am also a proud associate member of ELDAA, the End of Life Doula Association of Aotearoa.
Services
Celebrations
End of Life
Community
Rites of Passage
Contact
getrealconnection@gmail.com
0210444294


