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Life & Death
Community ◦ Creativity ◦ Connection

Life & Death
Community Creativity Connection

Truth, tenderness, humour, and clarity.

Sacha Hoogerwerf - Get Real Connection


I am Sacha Hoogerwerf

The person behind Get Real Connection.

My passion is real, honest human connection.

 

Whether I’m alongside someone dying, guiding a ceremony, or facilitating a workshop, I believe deeply in the courage of showing up fully — for ourselves and each other. You already have what you need. Sometimes you just need someone willing to guide you there.

 

I’d be honoured to walk alongside you.


Life.

We start with being born and then the spiral rolls out, through childhood, adolescence to adulthood.
And from there, if we are lucky to live a long life, we walk into elderhood and finally death.


It’s for all the big moments of change, sometimes obvious, sometimes not, that I want to offer my service.
The value of creating a moment to pause, witness, and be witnessed in a certain moment in life creates a deepening of the shared experiences and clears away any leftover energy for the next steps to be taken.
Sometimes it’s valuable to go back into the spiral together.

















Call it ritual, call it attention for the real stuff, call it marking life stages, I believe this is where the gold can be found.
For ourselves, our families, and our communities.


Some experiences that I have made bespoke ceremonies for are:

Baby blessings

New mama/papa blessings

Love union

Birthdays

Menopause

Career change

Divorce

Caring for someone who is sick or recovering

New beginnings after a crisis


Any situation, big or small - it is my job to create a way for you to celebrate the magnificence of life through it all..

And it all starts with a chat.

Life.

We start with being born and then the spiral rolls out, through childhood, adolescence to adulthood.
And from there, if we are lucky to live a long life, we walk into elderhood and finally death.


It’s for all the big moments of change, sometimes obvious, sometimes not, that I want to offer my service.
The value of creating a moment to pause, witness, and be witnessed in a certain moment in life creates a deepening of the shared experiences and clears away any leftover energy for the next steps to be taken.
Sometimes it’s valuable to go back into the spiral together.

















Call it ritual, call it attention for the real stuff, call it marking life stages, I believe this is where the gold can be found.
For ourselves, our families, and our communities.


Some experiences that I have made bespoke ceremonies for are:

Baby blessings

New mama/papa blessings

Love union

Birthdays

Menopause

Career change

Divorce

Caring for someone who is sick or recovering

New beginnings after a crisis


Any situation, big or small - it is my job to create a way for you to celebrate the magnificence of life through it all..

And it all starts with a chat.

What is a Rite of Passage?


A Rite of Passage is the conscious marking of a transition — the moment you move from one chapter of life into the next. Rather than letting these threshold moments slip by unnoticed, we pause, we witness, and we honour the change that is taking place.

 

Every Rite of Passage moves through three phases: first a separation, a letting go of what was; then the transition itself, the in-between space where transformation happens; and finally a re-integration, stepping forward into who you are becoming.

 

The threads that weave it all together are ritual and symbolism — a looking back at what has been, a stillness in the present moment, and a clear-eyed gaze toward what lies ahead. Most of all, it is the act of consciously crossing the threshold, and taking the time to integrate and harvest the meaning of what you have lived.

 

This is the work. And it is available to all of us, at every stage of life.



Life.


Life is a spiral — from birth through childhood, adolescence, adulthood, elderhood, and finally death. Along the way are big moments of change, sometimes obvious, sometimes not.

 

It’s in those moments that I offer my service. Pausing to witness — and be witnessed — creates a deepening of shared experience and clears the way for what comes next. Call it ritual, call it marking life stages, call it attention for the real stuff. This is where the gold can be found. For ourselves, our families, and our communities.

 

I’ve created bespoke ceremonies for baby blessings, new parent blessings, love unions, birthdays, menopause, career change, divorce, recovery, and new beginnings after crisis. Big or small, it all starts with a chat.

“Sacha made my 40th birthday celebration unforgettable. She organised a beautiful ceremony for me by the beach — so thoughtful, caring, and above all, so much fun. I highly recommend her if you’d like a special memory for yourself and your loved ones.”

“Sacha made my 40th birthday celebration unforgettable. She organised a beautiful ceremony for me by the beach — so thoughtful, caring, and above all, so much fun. I highly recommend her if you’d like a special memory for yourself and your loved ones.”

Bea Pokor, Nelson, Aotearoa · Bespoke birthday celebration

“Sacha was a joy to work with. She made our celebration of love a relaxed and enjoyable family event — professional on the official side, and warm and personal in the ceremony itself.”

“Sacha was a joy to work with. She made our celebration of love a relaxed and enjoyable family event — professional on the official side, and warm and personal in the ceremony itself.”

Erin Leigh, Wellington, Aotearoa · Marriage officiation & celebration

Death.

is the end.


No one gets out alive.

And yet most of us plan far less for dying than we do for birth. When we bring death into everyday conversation - when we normalise our own demise - something can shift.

 

I see death as a sacred event,

our final rite of passage. I have trained as a deathwalker, facilitated Death Cafes and I love exploring everything death-related. I sit with people who fear death - for themselves or someone close - so we can find more acceptance and ease around it together.

 

I’m not a therapist. I’m a mortal human who has loved and lost, and to me grief means love. I’m still practising the art of letting go - and I will be until the day I die.

 

Dying isn’t only personal. It touches workplaces, schools, and communities. If you want to bring conversations about death into your community, let’s talk.


Read more about Death Doulas at the End of Life Doula Alliance Aotearoa.


In July 2023 I was interviewed on the Deathwalker Guide to Life podcast — have a listen.

Link: Deathwalker Guide to Life — Episode 3

Death.

is the end.


No one gets out alive.

And yet most of us plan far less for dying than we do for birth. When we bring death into everyday conversation - when we normalise our own demise - something can shift.

 

I see death as a sacred event,

our final rite of passage. I have trained as a deathwalker, facilitated Death Cafes and I love exploring everything death-related. I sit with people who fear death - for themselves or someone close - so we can find more acceptance and ease around it together.

 

I’m not a therapist. I’m a mortal human who has loved and lost, and to me grief means love. I’m still practising the art of letting go - and I will be until the day I die.

 

Dying isn’t only personal. It touches workplaces, schools, and communities. If you want to bring conversations about death into your community, let’s talk.


Read more about Death Doulas at the End of Life Doula Alliance Aotearoa.


In July 2023 I was interviewed on the Deathwalker Guide to Life podcast — have a listen.

Link: Deathwalker Guide to Life — Episode 3

“Sacha was a tremendous support when my daughter-in-law was very ill and dying. For our whole family, she offered loving guidance and a steady presence through the hardest of times. She attended day and night after death — sleeping in the room on a mattress and changing the ice packs every six hours. Her honesty, integrity, and dignity showed in everything she did. We loved her for it.”

“Sacha was a tremendous support when my daughter-in-law was very ill and dying. For our whole family, she offered loving guidance and a steady presence through the hardest of times. She attended day and night after death — sleeping in the room on a mattress and changing the ice packs every six hours. Her honesty, integrity, and dignity showed in everything she did. We loved her for it.”

Joyce Deane, Nelson · Deathwalker & family support

“I will always be grateful for Sacha’s capacity to support my dad and me when my mum died at home. We were exhausted, and Sacha came in, communicated with the funeral director and nurses, and looked after everything. She helped wash and dress Mum in her favourite clothes, and was the celebrant at the funeral. Her reassuring presence and skill meant the world to us.”

“I will always be grateful for Sacha’s capacity to support my dad and me when my mum died at home. We were exhausted, and Sacha came in, communicated with the funeral director and nurses, and looked after everything. She helped wash and dress Mum in her favourite clothes, and was the celebrant at the funeral. Her reassuring presence and skill meant the world to us.”

David Zeegers, Amsterdam · Deathwalker, family support, funeral celebrant

What is a deathwalker?



A deathwalker is a guide. Someone who walks alongside the dying and their loved ones — not to take over, not to have all the answers, but to help you find your own way through one of life’s most profound passages.

 

Death is not a medical event to be managed. It is a deeply human experience, and you are more capable of meeting it than you might think. My role is to walk beside you, to ask the questions that open new ground, and to help you discover what this threshold looks like for you — on your own terms, in your own way.

 

I believe that families and dying people hold more wisdom than they realise. Sometimes that wisdom just needs a little space, a steady presence, and someone willing to go there with you. I am not here to carry it for you. I am here to remind you that you can carry it yourself — and to walk alongside you while you do.

  

I have trained as a deathwalker, facilitated Death Cafes, and sat with dying people in their most vulnerable and most courageous moments. I am not a therapist. I am a mortal human who has loved and lost, and to me grief means love.


Want to understand the role more deeply? This talk by deathwalker Zenith Virago is a beautiful place to start.

Link: Watch the TED talk

I am also a proud associate member of ELDAA, the End of Life Doula Association of Aotearoa.


It starts with a conversation

There is no pressure, no script, and no wrong reason to reach out. Whether you are in the middle of something big, standing at a threshold you didn’t choose, or simply feeling the quiet pull toward something more meaningful - I would love to hear from you.

 

Every ceremony, every ritual, every moment of support I offer begins the same way. With a cup of tea, a good listen, and a real conversation.

It starts with a conversation

There is no pressure, no script, and no wrong reason to reach out. Whether you are in the middle of something big, standing at a threshold you didn’t choose, or simply feeling the quiet pull toward something more meaningful - I would love to hear from you.

 

Every ceremony, every ritual, every moment of support I offer begins the same way. With a cup of tea, a good listen, and a real conversation.

Death.

Death is the end. No one gets out alive. And yet, most of us  still do not do as much planning for dying & death as we do for birthing a new life. And I believe that when we make death, and endings in general,  more part of our day to day conversations, when we normalise our own demise, we will potentially come more alive. 

I am passionate about death. I see it as a sacred event, our final rite of passage. I have trained as a death doula, facilitated death cafes and I enjoy having a playful, embodied exploration into anything that has to do with death. I am happy to get together with people who fear death, for themselves or someone close to them, so we can find more acceptance and relaxation about it. I am not a therapist. I am a mortal human who has lost loved ones and knows that grief means love. I am still practicing the art of letting go and I will until the day I die. 

Dying is not a personal event only, it has an impact on work places, schools and the neighborhood. I am all for building networks of support and connection to share our humanness. If you want to talk about death in your organisation, let me know.


Read more about Death Doulas at the End of Life Doula Alliance Aotearoa.

Death.

is the end.


No one gets out alive.

And yet, most of us still do not do as much planning for dying & death as we do for birthing a new life.


I believe that when we make death, and endings in general, more part of our day-to-day conversations—when we normalise our own demise—we will potentially come more alive.


I am passionate about death. I see it as a sacred event, our final rite of passage.

I have trained as a death doula, facilitated death cafes, and I enjoy having a playful, embodied exploration into anything that has to do with death.

I am happy to get together with people who fear death, for themselves or someone close to them, so we can find more acceptance and relaxation about it. I am not a therapist. I am a mortal human who has lost loved ones and knows that grief means love. I am still practicing the art of letting go—and I will until the day I die.


Dying is not only a personal event.

It has an impact on workplaces, schools, and the neighborhood. I am all for building networks of support and connection to share our humanness. If you want to talk about death in your organisation, let me know.


Read more about Death Doulas at the End of Life Doula Alliance Aotearoa.




Services

Celebrations

End of Life

Community

Rites of Passage

Contact

getrealconnection@gmail.com

0210444294

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